Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Lush Mullets and Mattresses

Wake the fuck up! Shaken NOT stirred. I have had the same reoccurring dream for the past score and some change. Same frickin dream.. It has always been about being a broken man. A man that was once a gleaming example of all that is righteous and good, and now broken. No job, ambition, love from others, or saddest of all, no money.

I'm WAY addicted to it. Money that is. I'll letchu in on a little secret.. I am a greedy summa-mo-bitch. I still have money from my first business when I was 12. (I used to own a landscaping business with 1 employee. Me.) I think maybe I shoulda been born Jewish. Not because I'm one of the chosen people, but because I know how to spin a dolla outta 15 cents. What can I say? It's a gift.

Let it be known that my willpower has never outgrown my ambition. Werd. I know it can't be too healthy to be this money hungry. I seem to have a fear of being ordinary if that makes any sense. Fast forward>> Present day.. I have all of the toys most men of my age want. <-- not humble asshat! I used to have a personal assistant/driver but he fired me. I'm sure he would have stayed, had I not been such an arrogant, stingy, dick triscut, but such is life. When I think about it realistically, it would have never werked out. I needed a guy with some gumption. A solid mutha luva I could rely on. It's hard to roll dirty when your driver might turn you in for carrying around a concealed Rambo knife and some blueberry blunts.

Maybe I want to much? Is that possible? We were all raised to believe we'd be millionaires and or famous by now. All the toys, women, weed, and fame we'd have at our disposal! Yeah right!?! In a society of fully grown 27yr old boys, raised by women, we are at a loss. It's kinda funny to think about it. All my life momma said "You're so handsome." She reveled in the idea that I would "have women beating down my door." Her friends would tease that she was gonna have problems when I got older. My dimples and smile were "gonna make me irresistible to the girlies." You probably do this to your sons now. Will you also be upset when it happens. When he is deemed a player, a cheater? When he expects to be treated differently based on his attractiveness and wit alone?

We are at constant odds with what our identity is. I personally was raised by a very strong woman. She molded me into a caring thoughtful individual. One minor detail she forgot was humility. Vanity, greed, and the fact that I don't have enough shoes or New Era 5150 hats is a testament. Werd. I know it's wrong, I just don't give a shit.

I have werked along time for what I have. It must be noted that I don't blame anyone for my upbringing. Being an Angry Step Kid has been an interesting carpet ride and I blame no one! I have paved this road and when I lay my lush mullet down at night I am satisfied. Not every man can rock a 1984 Michael Jackson, red and black zipper jacket with the confidence I can. Bitch, I'm sexy. I'm gonna hit the sack now. Just to brag a little more. You should know, I have a Sealy Posturepedic California King Size bed with 1500 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets that I will probably puke on after I finish off whats in my trusty Scotch filled flask. Werd.


Demented Duchess on January 22, 2011 at 4:06 AM said...

I think I love you. Just thought you should know. Werd.

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