Monday, August 16, 2010

My Shit is Bling Bling

I have had the same style since the beginning of time. I dress cool. My "Style" has gotten me laid at least once. I mean it could have been the 80 bucks I spent on drinks but I believe it was my clothing. I keep it pretty basic. Flippy floppies, T-shirt, Cargo shorts, and a baseball cap.

As I begin to age and near the ripe timeless age of 27. (I will NOT age anymore after 27 due to that's when all the great Rock Gods seem to die) I am forced to "dress better" You know, upgrade my 3rd grade schoolyard look and find something more age appropriate. "Why?",  you ask, No worries, I asked the same question. Now please keep in mind, I rarely give two shits about what people think. "I am the shit and chicks dig me." Has been my credo since I borned my first pubic hair.

Recently though, I have been inundated with all type of Hogwash about "Metrosexualism and the modern man" Basically bullshit printed to make men finally feel self-conscience about their outward appearance. I agree that men should wash their ass, brush their teeth, and shave the under carriage. These are a must. Swamp crotch, Bad breath, and Man Funk are NEVER a good look. But to have the media say that "Men need to be taught how to dress their age." is fucking retarded. Seriously.

I think about it like this.. I have friends who are mildly famous. Men who have quote unquote succeeded in their professions and who have been in music videos, commercials, movies, and the occasional sitcom. These fuckers are also the summa-mo-bitches that we're drunk, passed out on the couch, after they pissed themselves. They dress like I do. Like the guys from "Entourage" only in real life. Is it such a bad thing to love yourself in khaki pants and a T-shirt from the movie "Hostel"? I guess maybe this rant has answered my rant. Those fuckers from "The Hangover" we're pretty fucking cool too.

Maybe, if I keep this up I can get laid once more. Probably not, but I'm keeping my flip flops and cargo shorts anyway. For the record, in my profession I HAVE to wear a shirt and tie EVERYDAY! Is this the "look" I wanna wear? No. Double fuck no! Would I be deemed more attractive if I wore the monkey suit ALL the time? Maybe. Do I seriously care? No.


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